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"That's just how it is," is the response that most people give.The opportunity to earn more money is often more lucrative than staying at home.So, if you're dating a Chinese guy, make sure to figure out what the both of you want out of the relationship so you can manage expectations.I've heard stories from second-hand sources about Chinese women wanting to date to get better at English or get a green card.With filial piety being taught in school from first-grade on, I've found that Chinese adults take their parents' word very seriously.Jocelyn's now father-in-law told his son that he was welcome to be friends with a Western woman but not to date her.I didn't realize just how common this is when we were dating and I got lucky and found a guy that likes to stay close to home.The two times he's been given the option to go to Inner Mongolia, and triple his income, he's turned it down.
In a post on her blog, Speaking Of China, Jocelyn recalls the story of a Chinese taxi driver telling her that he couldn't satisfy the needs of foreign women in a previous relationship. Chinese people tend to think Americans are rich and can't provide for us on their smaller salary.
As for free English lessons, although my husband and I only communicate in English, I know of several couples who speak Chinese because their boyfriend or husband doesn't speak a word of it.
From my experience at least, contrary to some stereotypes, getting free English lessons doesn’t seem to be a big priority for them when it comes to dating Westerners.
Part of this comes from their obligation to care for their aging parents and grandparents.
Also it's easier for them to continue their career here, especially if they're older and already established in their career.
Compared to the way my husband grew up in post-Cultural Revolution China, the modest home I grew up in is a mansion.